Pregnancy

This sums it up. I feel like caca!

Where I'm At

Wow. I havent' even glanced at this blog in months and i'm only taking the time to do so now because well I actually have a moment to breathe. Really I don't. I should be doing math homework that i'm a week behind on, but I just don' have any motivation. I'm exhausted and burnt out on school and chasing after my kid and trying to keep our photography biz going and also keeping the house clean, laundry done, dinner made and budget followed. Staying home....NO JOKE! My incentive at the end of the day is that everyone is alive and their bellies are full and they have something to wear tomorrow. Meanwhile....don't look at me cuz i'm looking crazy with my whispies all over the place, my once black now faded gray sweat pants now melting into my skin because i've had them on so long and the 12 lbs of luggage under my eyes. I'm looking somewhere between Nick Nolte's mugshot and just straight up homeless.

Anyhow,

The past few months my best friend has been living with us. She's known me as long as Mike and we all grew up together. She lived with me in Phoenix and when I moved back she moved to Texas with our other friend. She'd been seeing this guy on and off for years (that I introduced her to in like 2005) and she recently got pregnant and moved back to Utah to be closer to family and him. (He lives in Idaho) Well turns out she's preg with identical twin girls and she has this rare syndrome called Twin to twin transfusion syndrome where one twin is smaller and getting less bloodflow. The past 2 weeks she's been admitted to the hospital and may have to stay there until her babies are born. Could be a few weeks or could be another 15 weeks or so. She's not due until May and she's only 27 weeks now. Definitely been hard on her. She's like a sister to me, so it has not been easy to see her like this. It also turns out that her and her baby daddy don't like each other so much so she's virtually doing this all alone. I'm glad to have her back and I just pray that everything works out for her and her lil girls.

As for me

I have passed all of my classes so far (still not sure how) and i'm into my 4th semester of school now. It went by so fast. I'm starting my upper division courses this summer (except for math) and i'm not sure how we're going to do it. Mike started a new job at Wells Fargo Bank as a Personal Banker. I'm glad he's no longer on the roads and he's only about 15 mins away with an awesome schedule but I'm not sure how that is going to work with me having to be IN class soon. He really likes the job though and he seems happy to have made the change.

In December, we were all sick. Coen got the Noro Virus. Poop and Puke for 7 days. Definitely not my finest week and as you know, my husband does not do well with poop so for the most part I handled it. I don't do well with puke though, so he helped on that end.  A week after that he got a nasty cold. Utah and it's shitty air. SMH. It was not a fun month. On top of that, we found out were were pregnant, took a test 2 days later only to find it was negative. We had what is called a chemical pregnancy. It's a very very early miscarriage. The Dr said it was perfectly normal and a lot of women have them without even knowing.  It was a bit disappointing, but I didn't have any symptoms except a late period. I kind of had a feeling something was off.  Well it threw off my cycle and we weren't sure when we could try again but just a few days ago we took a test and it was positive and now 2 days later it's positive again. i'm not sure if this one is going to stick or not and i'm kind of scared but I definitely have symptoms this time. I'm only about 4 weeks. I'm gonna see the doctor at 9 weeks and hopefully everything is going smoothly. We're excited but trying not to get our hopes up. We're estimating another late October early November baby. What is it about October for us?

So...that's what's going on for us. Same ol' same ol' except possibly a lil sis or bro for Co Co Bean.  I will try to get back to keepin this up but I make no promises.  Especially since i'm going to have two kids running around soon. I'm also thinking I may have to take little break from school. I'm going to have my hands full! But we'll see. One day at a time.

Sometimes

Sometimes
I don't want
my feet
on the ground
 I want to dream.
keep my heart full
and my dreams big.
head in the clouds.

I want the world to stop
for just a moment.
to feel the heat
the shiver
the tingle.
To just breathe.

I want to spin
with my arms stretched out.
to dance til
I sweat
laugh til
there are tears

To smile
without force

to feel silly
and free

Sometimes...

I'm alive....

Barely. I am nose deep in Mathematical equations and, business terms and learning about how the Nandi's wipe their booties. It's all far too interesting and complicated and so i'm ignoring you...

Just kiddin. I  hate it. All of it, but I'm determined to pass these bitches (my classes) and so I have to keep my head in the books. I just took a short break to breathe, nibble and hydrate!

I am however doing my November Thankfuls in picture form, which I will post when all of this crap is over.

Until then...Tootle-Loo!

I Vote...that Everybody Shutup!

Let me say this: I am proud to be an American. I am ever so thankful for the rights that I have in this beautiful country. I'm a woman, I'm African American and Latina, and I have the right to vote. I am so thankful for the people that fought and sacrificed for me to be able to do so.  I have exercised my right and my right not to vote.

This year, I am especially annoyed with the Election. People, that I know can't even spell election, are acting like they have had all the facts of what the President has done and not done and what needs to be done.  I've never seen so much action. Where was all this hullabaloo during the last 4 years? Not a peep from anybody about anything. Half of these folks just found out it was time to vote, the day before. Then when Obama won (No I didn't vote....but I don't think we were quite ready for Mitt) people are talking about how disgusted they are with it and how the world is in the shit hole etc, How they're going to move to Canada etc...  I'm just like...shut the hell up. He got reelected...so deal with it. I can't wait til everyone quiets down with this crap. Like...man, you didn't give 2 shits about anything and now you wanna talk about how the President should run the country? Go to sleep!

Honestly, I wasn't super excited about either one of the candidates. They both have their good and their bad. I don't trust either one of them. They talk a big talk, and say what they gotta say to gets votes. Once they got their foot in the door....it's another story.  All we can do is sit back and watch how everything unfolds. The people really don't have much say in it all. Everybody likes to make you think you do, but it's more like a tally. How many people like Obama over Mitt...Huh...well that's nice...but what really counts is this Electoral College vote that has nothing to do with all of ya'll people standing in line. SMH

LOL...J/K...vote if you want :)

Anyway,

Now we get onto more upbeat things....Like Thanksgiving!.....

Candy Licker

Here's a lil classy music treat I've recently discovered!

Trick or Treat

Here's a lil F.F. about me. I love me some Halloween. I don't know what it is.  The crisp autumn air, the crinkle of leaves as you walk down the sidewalk, the long dark days. I dunno, but I dig it! It's the only Holiday that I really feel like you can decorate yourself and your house to the fullest. I'm not really into Christmas and Thanksgiving, I just want to decorate my stomach...with food. I have lil decor here and there for all the holidays but I love going all out for Halloween.  My mom has always been super crafty and hand made almost all of our costumes growing up so...cheers to Mom for passing it onto me!

We live in a Condo, so we get ZERO trick or treaters. I doubt if my neighbors even notice the lovely homemade skull and cross-bone wreath I made or my candy corn vases. Sigh...So I happily bombard my mother's house with all of my ideas. I think even she was kind of shocked how excited I was to transform her house into a witches den. 

The lovely Pinterest helped me in more ways than one this year. I made Coen's costume and I got a lot of decorating ideas. We took Coen out on Saturday for Witchery or something on Historic 25th street.  His costume was a big hit. People were stopping me to take pictures of him. Poor kid could hardly walk  in the thing, so I had to be on face-plant-protection-status at all times. He was adorable and I was feeling pretty damn pleased with myself. 

Today of course, he wanted nothing to do with the costume and instead cried and tried to pull it off and ate half of the marshmallows. LOL. Kids...they like to keep you on your toes I tell ya.  He was THE cutest lil cup of Hot Cocoa you've ever seen in your life and I'm glad that at least on Saturday he participated and we got a few pics.

I however, had a friggin blast getting all dressed up with my mom and hubby while Coen proudly paraded around the house with a sticky marshmallow face and no costume ha ha.

Me and Mom on our awesome porch:

Snacks we made for scary movie night

The kids can't have all the fun right? Here's me and the Dark Knight aka My husband :)

These eyelashes weighed about 900 lbs each.  I can now officially lift a refrigerator with my eyelids!

Happy Halloween Folks!