Flashback Friday

This is a confession and a flashback I guess. 

Billy Idol rocks my friggin socks!

Yes, It's true.
If I hear any of his songs I'm instantly transported into bad ass mode (which usually means I clean the house very well and make an awesome dinner LOL)

Doesn't he make you want to bleach your hair, wear leather and  fist pump for hours?

Ok maybe not...but I still dig him!

Sunday Confession

I have not left my son with anybody except for Mike since he was born. It's never more than 2-3 hours and then i'm back. Frantically inspecting him and making sure all fingers and toes are in tact and that his eyeballs haven't fallen out or that he hasn't miraculously grown an extra arm...

 Well...we've decided we need some much needed Mommy and Daddy time. Time to feel like two irresponsible adults that can stay out as late as they want (Probably more like midnight) and listen to unnecessarily loud music. April 3, Young the Giant is having a show in Salt Lake and I really really wanted to go. So after dropping several subtle hints...Mike bought the tickets. We asked his mom to babysit and so it's all set.

3, 2, 1....FrEaK oUt!!

What if Coen screams the whole time?

What if he won't eat? Or sleep? Or is scared?

What if he decides to do a back-flip off the couch or the dog eats his face off?

These are real rational fears people!

The show starts at 6:30 so I'm thinking we won't be home til about midnight or later.  I'm sure he'll be fine, but that's a long time  for us to be apart.  And if he's not happy that's gonna suck for Mike's mom.  It may be 6+ hours of hell. I know it's time for us to do this. I mean...he is 5 months old. We've got to be able to leave him with a babysitter once in awhile. I'm just not mentally prepared. I'm not sure he is either. But we're gonna give it a go.  We need this.

Home Sweet Sweet Home

I am very content with staying at home. I work only twice a week (more for play money and for a lil social interaction) I would be perfectly fine not attending a social activity every week or seeing friends.  I don't know if it's just something that happens when you have a family, but I'm happy hanging out with just my hubby and my son.  I don't have to come up with conversation. I don't have to pack my son up with extra outfits and diapers. I don't have to comb my hair or put on a clean shirt. I can walk around with my boob out, in yesterdays sweats and my hair full of whispies. Coen can just chill in his diaper and watch mama make crazy faces. I can walk to the park and just take in the noise of passing cars and pet dogs through the fence and be back home in 30 minutes.Maybe its because my kids are little and I will never have these moments with them again. They'll get to a point where they're gonna have "cooler" people to hang out with than their mom. Anyhow,  If I "plan" on going anywhere it takes forever to get ready to go and then once we're there I'm sneaking into another room to breastfeed or apologizing that my kid is screaming his head off for no apparent reason or for the fact that I can't participate in whatever is going on. And if Mike's home, I'd rather be home with him. I'm too lazy to be social....but i'm happy with it. Facebook and this blog exhaust all the energy I'm willing to give. Call me anti-social...I call it content!

Night Owl

I don't know how I did it but I passed my life science test that I bullshitted on for 3 weeks. Thank goodness. I only missed 3 out of 40.  I've gotta get back into the groove. Lately it's been hard because Coen has been so sick and plus we all have been fighting this thing for weeks. Damn Utah weather needs to make up its mind. One minute its sunny next minute it's snowing. I know I've lived here almost my entire life and I should be used to it but....I'm ready for sunshine!

Lately I've been staying up waaaay too late. I don't know when this started but  I think it's because it's the only time I have all to myself. I love my husband and my baby but i'd like to be with just myself and my own thoughts once in awhile.  I stay up surfing the net, blogging, plucking my eyebrows, taking a long much needed shower, reading a magazine, flipping through the coupons, writing in my journal,  studying (rarely) or cleaning up the house a lil.  It gives me a lil bit of ME time.

It's probably foolish because I should be sleeping but, I enjoy it.I don't feel rushed. I have so much anxiety with Coen. I hold my breath every time I lay him down to sleep (hoping he doesn't wake up) and when he is awake and I'm doing something I have anxiety about hurrying to get it done before he cries. I think this is why I can't study during the day. I can't concentrate.

Honestly I've always been a night person. I've always worked two jobs leaving the nighttime for me to unwind. Now that Mike works til about midnight or so we usually stay up together catching up and enjoying the presence of the other in the house simultaneously.


Oh well...what can ya do? When it decides to warm up outside I will stop hibernating until noon everyday.

Yawn......

5 months

Although it has been a very tumultuous month filled with dr's appt's and medicine and crying, Coen is still a lil G and has crossed many milestones. He is starting to sit-up on his own (a lil) and discovering his hands. He's rolling over from back to front and I think he's starting to teeth (which is not gonna be fun) He's sleeping longer during the night in his bassinet. He's outgrowing it though, so it looks like we'll be moving him to the crib and into his room soon. I still find myself springing from bed suddenly to check if he's breathing, so we'll see how much sleep mama gets once he's in the crib. It's a good thing though. It's time.

PhotoBomb!

Just waking up from a nap

playtime with papa

Big smiles

All tuckered out

Giggle Box 

Sitting Up like a big boy

Just Loungin'

Stroller Buddies

"What are these things?"

Poor lil sick guy

SleepyTime with Mama

Sunday Confession

I've been so busy running around taking care of my sick boys that other areas of our lives have been neglected.

Check out the fridge!

Well...at least we have the essentials...Butter, Eggs and Water. 

We can make it through a few more days eh? :)

Flashback Friday

We did not have a videographer  at our wedding (which in retrospect I really regret) But thankfully my aunt recorded some of the wedding and it's all we have. Lately the vids have not been playing on my computer and it's been freaking me out...so what better way to preserve them than to upload it on my blog?

(Love is you-By Chrisette Michelle)

Vows

Sunday Confession

I cried for my son for the first time.

I don't think I even cried when he was born. I was so groggy and out-of-it I barely remember my first time holding him. But he's been so sick the past 2 weeks and the past few days were just awful. I took him to the doctor once and they told me, "Oh, he's fine. Just a normal cold." So I proceeded with the "snot-sucker" and the humidifier and endured the sound of his nasty cough night after night.  Finally it all came to a head the other night. He would not eat, or open his eyes or sleep unless we held him. You ever gone to sleep sitting up? Not easy. The next afternoon, exhausted and worried we took him to the hospital.

We arrived at 1 pm. There were maybe 5 people ahead of us...we weren't seen until 3:30!! My poor boy was snot faced and weezy and tired. And I was tired, hungry, and to top it off I was "leaking" through my t-shirt because I was in such a hurry to get him there that I ran out of the house without thinking twice. I was just so annoyed that I didn't even care that anybody saw.  As the receptionist popped in another movie our name was finally called.

 We sat in the exam room for another 20 minutes. Coen just cried and cried and cried. I was so exhausted and pissed that I just started crying. Now, if you know me...you know i'm not much of a crier. I was at my wits end though.I felt pretty silly right after and tried the whole hold-your-eyelid-open-really-wide-so-it-doesn't-look-like-you're-crying-trick. Pretty sure it didn't work, but whatever. I was done! Finally the Dr. came in and he was actually pretty nice. Turns out Coen had an ear infection in both ears. We were sent home after a 10 minute exam with Amoxcicillan and further disdain for the medical system.

Flashback Friday

 Me, in my prime!

I think i'm about 6 here. No front teeth. Large glasses. Nappy Hair.

 Am I wearing some sort of over-sized choir smock?

 I know you're jealous of how fresh I was!

Sunday Confession

I am so done with all of these debates on religion. Every where I look someone is being judged for their beliefs. Living in Utah my entire life (minus 3 very revealing years) there has always been the issue of religion. Utah is known for the Mormon religion. I know as much as I want to know about it and decided long ago it is not for me. I have no ill will towards the religion or missionaries or anybody exercising their right to be Mormon. My father was raised staunch catholic and my mother was raised by my grandmother whom was Jehovah's Witness for a span and is now actually LDS. My mother and father weren't big fans of organized religion, and neither am I. I was raised to believe in God. I prayed over every meal, I said my prayers at night  and I was read the Bible. I had my own stretch of time where I visited different churches to see which suited me best. Catholic, Mormon, Baptist, Non-denominational, None of them really called to me.  They all just seem like a business to me. My stance on religion has changed over the years and i'll admit that i'm not the most educated person on it. I can't quote the Bible from front to back or know every psalm for every situation.  But I believe what I believe and i'm very comfortable with my beliefs. If I have to answer for anything later....that's on me. I do not need nor want anybody trying to save my soul or telling me or trying to convince me that there is a better way to do it than the way I am. If you've found a way to exercise your belief...congratulations. I'm happy for you. I respect you all the same.

 I've recently had several situations with the missionaries coming to visit. I am kind and honest and respectfully decline. They've continued to knock on my door for months. So recently I posted a sign asking for No Soliciting or Religious Queries. I do not mind that they are just serving their mission and this is what they were sent out to do. I do mind having to tell them over and over that i'm not interested. Its starting to become uncomfortable. My husband served a mission in Brasil and was a part of the church since childhood. He still has tremendous respect for the church, but has since parted ways before we re-met.  He has his reasons and beliefs and I have mine. We are both very happy together and although we do not practice any particular religion we still strive to have good-morals and to be good people.

Religion is always a very heated debate and i'm definitely not trying to go there. I just simply want to say...you have your beliefs and I have mine. If mine differ from yours, that does not mean you need to pray for me. Pray for yourself and your judging and self-righteousness. All this bitterness and arguing about who's beliefs are right or wrong are ridiculous. No person on earth can know. Many claim they do. But we all have to find out for ourselves. Those that REALLY  know...are dead and they're keeping it a secret.

Theodor Suess, Geisel

Probably one of the best children's authors of all time. I have a few fav's. Him, Roald Dahl, Shel Silverstein,  Mercer Mayer etc.......But today is Dr. Seuss' birthday and also Read Across America Day. I try to read to my son every night. It's a nice escape from the heavy reading i'm doing for college.